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Shying Away from Shyness 远避羞怯

课文朗读

课文讲解

繁體中文譯本

Pauline, who has just started a new job, is asking her friend Samuel for advice on interpersonal skills:  宝琳刚开始一份新工作，她请朋友山谬，给她一些人际关系技巧的建议：

P: I would really like to overcome my shyness – it’s completely counterproductive.

我真的很想克服自己的害羞感，可是总造成反效果。

S: That’s true. Moreover, refusing to talk to people can give off the impression that you’re a snob.

那倒是。而且，你不愿和别人说话，会给人傲慢的印象。

P: That’s just what my colleges said! After I declined to join our corporate bowling team, I overheard several co-workers grumbling about my aloofness.

我同事就是这么说的！我之前婉拒加入公司的保龄球队，后来无意间听到同事不满我这么疏离。

S: See! That’s why you need to get a handle on your social phobia.

你看吧！所以你需要控制一下你的社交恐惧症。

P: But I don’t know where to begin.

但是我不知道从何做起。

S: For starters, you need to deal with your feelings of inadequacy. Your reluctance to engage with others in social situations probably stems from a fear of rejection.

一开始呢，你需要处理自身不足的感觉，你不情愿在社交场合和别人交际，可能是源自害怕被人拒绝的恐惧。

P: Maybe. Whenever I have to face people, there’s a little voice inside my head telling me that they won’t like me, or that I won’t have anything worthwhile to say.

可能吧，每当我必须面对人群，脑中就有一个小小的声音，告诉我别人不会喜欢我，或是我没有什么值得听的话可说。

S: When that happens, just ask yourself, “What’s the worst thing that could happen?”

那个时候你就问自己，「最糟的情况是什么？」

P: That’s easy. They could laugh in my face, call me names, beat me with their umbrellas –

这倒不难。他们可能当面嘲笑我、辱骂我、或用雨伞打我……

S: Don’t be so dramatic! Truthfully, when has that ever happened?

别太戏剧化了！说真的，这种事什么时候发生过？

P: OK, OK. I see your point. My shyness is more likely to disappoint myself than anyone else.

好啦，好啦，我懂你的意思了。我可能比其他人对我自己的害羞更感到失望。

Vocabulary

单词发音

shy away from (由于羞怯或恐惧)躲开, 避开; 回避; 退缩 to avoid something

interpersonal [͵ɪntɚˋpɝsən!] adj. 人与人之间的; 人际关系的

counterproductive [ˋkaʊntɚprəˋdʌktɪv] adj. 产生不良后果的

give off 发出, 发散

snob [snɑb] n. 自负傲慢的人; 谄上骄下的势利鬼

decline [dɪˋklaɪn] v. 婉拒；谢绝[+to-v]

overhear [͵ovɚˋhɪr] v. 偶然听到，无意中听到；偷听

grumble [ˋgrʌmb!] v. 抱怨，发牢骚[（+at/about/over）]

aloofness [əˋlufnɪs] n. 冷漠，高傲，超然离群

get a handle on 控制或掌握某事 to find a way to understand a situation in order to control it

phobia [ˋfobɪə] n. 恐惧症；惧怕

for starters【口】首先; 作为开头

inadequacy [ɪnˋædəkwəsɪ] n.〔质量﹑能力﹑大小等〕不足﹐欠缺

engage [ɪnˋgedʒ] v. 适应；（与…）建立密切关系

stem from 起源于; 由...造成

worthwhile [ˋwɝθˋhwaɪl] adj. 值得花费时间（或金钱）的，值得做的

laugh in someone’s face 公开表示蔑视某人

call someone names 骂人  to use impolite or unpleasant words to describe someone

Sentence of the Day

She's a shrinking violet.

她碰到生人总是怯怯羞羞。

shrinking violet【谑】非常怕羞的人; 怕见场面的人

violet [ˋvaɪəlɪt] adj. 紫萝兰色，紫色; 羞怯的人

课文讲解

Samuel continues to advise Pauline on overcoming her shyness:  山谬继续给宝琳克服害羞的建议：

S: Once you overcome your lack of self-confidence, relating to other people will become much easier.

一旦你克服了缺乏自信的问题，和别人的相处就会容易得多。

P: People will see me as I see myself, right? So if I act friendly and confident –

别人怎么看我，就像我怎么看自己，对不对？所以如果我表现得很友善、有自信……

S: That’s exactly how they’ll see you too! Your self-perception, your actions, and the way you are viewed by others are inexorably linked.

别人也会这样看你这个人，你的自我认知、行为、和别人对你的看法，都是密切相关的。

P: That’s all well and good, but what can I do to start believing in myself?

好吧，但我要怎样才能相信自己的能力？

S: Start taking risks. Expose yourself to socially intimidating experiences more often.

开始冒险啊，让自己更勇于接受社交上的挑战。

P: No pain, no gain, so to speak. I should also stop setting such high standards for myself. I’m not going to become the life of the party overnight!

就是说，不劳则无获。我也应该不要对自己要求那么高，我又不是要一夜之间成为社交女王！

S: No one expects you to either. And if your efforts are rejected, take it in stride.

也没有人期望你做得到。而且就算你的努力没得到肯定，你也要泰然处之。

P: That’s a crucial point; people will have their personal reasons for ignoring me; I usually assume it’s because of my own deficiencies.

那就是关键，别人忽视我有其个人原因，但我就会以为是我自己不好。

S: Which perpetuates your cycle of self-loathing.

所以你就感到厌恶自己，恶性循环下去。

P: I guess it’s time I stopped being so hard on myself.

我想该是我停止这么苛责自己的时候了。

S: Exactly! You can only control your own behavior, not the reactions of others.

没错！你只能掌控自己的行为，不能控制别人的反应。

P: I just need to be responsible for my behavior – not that of others – take chances, and social confidence will follow.

我只需要对自己的行为而不是别人的行为负责，并且把握机会，自然就会对社交能力有自信。

－by Francoise Raunet

Vocabulary

单词发音

self-perception 自我感受 An awareness of the characteristics that constitute one's self; self-knowledge.

inexorably [ɪnˋɛksərəblɪ] adv. 不可阻挡地; 不容变更地; 无情地；冷酷地

all well and good 【口】好倒是好(但也有不如意处) acceptable, all right

intimidating [ɪnˋtɪmə͵detɪŋ] adj. 吓人的，令人生畏的

the life of the party （社交场合的）活跃人物 someone who makes everyone enjoy things more

overnight [ˋovɚˋnaɪt] adv. 一夜间，突然

take it in stride 从容对付某事 to calmly and easily deal with something unpleasant or difficult and not let it affect what you are doing

deficiency [dɪˋfɪʃənsɪ] n. 缺陷，缺点

perpetuate [pɚˋpɛtʃʊ͵et] v. 使长存; 使永恒

loathe [loð] v. 厌恶，憎恨[U][+v-ing]

take chances  冒险

Sentence of the Day

You can change your ways.

你可以改变作风。